A Letter to Her

The following is a letter I wrote when conducting a speed typing activity the other day.  It’s addressed to a best friend that….well, isn’t my friend anymore.  It is not proofread or corrected.  Just my raw feelings on paper (so to speak).

 

            You knew me better than I knew myself.   You knew things about me no one else knows. Literally. You’re the only person that knows how I am; who I like. You were the friend I used to visit out of the blue. No invitation needed. We would go to publix and buy pies and cakes and just sit and eat them without any plates. You took care of me, albeit sometimes against my will, when I was drunk and needed to shower or change.

What have we been reduced to?

I don’t now what happened that night. You put me on the back burner. Ignored me. No reply to my texts. Just silence. A silence filled with the words you wanted to say but didn’t. The silence was a cracked dam about to burst. A torrent of emotions and thoughts that remained internalized.

Weeks passed and not one word said to each other. A silent tension culminating to the final crack before the dam broke: no contact on my birthday. Nothing. Your birthday is the day after mine, so I know you didn’t forget.

I think this is when we went from best friends to acquaintances…no, strangers. I never understood how friends drift apart like that. But now, I consider you someone of my past. It’s only been about a month and a half, but that’s all I need. There was no closure so I have to be the one to create it.

But don’t think that I’m upset. Although I am sad, I find happiness: happiness in the fact that you helped me grow.   You gave me memories for a lifetime. Memories I wouldn’t share with anybody else.

So, thank you. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being my confidant and I yours. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without the experiences we have had. I am so grateful to have had a friend like you as most people don’t.

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2 thoughts on “A Letter to Her

    1. Yeah, its been 7 months and we still haven’t spoken. You don’t understand, she and I were almost inseparable. I think what made us drift apart was not being able to communicate better. She wasn’t the best at any kind of confrontation. She just internalized things and let them simmer inside her.

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